Blessed to Be Alive

My arms are hurting wit these IV’s #blessedtobealive NeNe, I am so sorry for your mishap, and THANK GOD for your intuitions of listening to your body! Lord only knows how things like this come about thx to Celeb Masta, but He was certainly holding your hand until He knew you could handle yourself through this safely. You have been through so much stress with all that has been going on. Your beautiful wedding alone was a breath taker as it was! GORGEOUSNESS! You have to slow it down a bit though NeNe!. I know you have alot going on as to what your future holds and with what is beyond the next door that opens. It will all be okay NeNe if you BREATHE and take it all as it comes. God will judge your direction and you just need to follow His lead! He has not let you down and He is giving you the strength to slow down and catch up with “NeNe”! Life is short, and YOU, my dear, are STRONG! Do not underestimate yourself by ANY means. Just stop putting so much on your plate and SLOW DOWN! I really love you for all you have been through and all of the mountains you have managed to climb. I so wish I could have met you before I moved from the Atlanta area. I lived in Carrollton (50 mi, South from you) for about 25 yrs., and went through hell & high waters, when I really needed a TRUE friend to confide & trust in. I had been burned by too many “friends/acquaintances” and have learned the almighty word of TRUST to be a meticulous part of my vocabulary, after experiencing all of the drama (divorce, infidelity, etc,) that had unknowingly been invading my life. Moving to Hilton Head Island was a direction I decided to accept, as an offer from my very close cousin (more like a sister at the time) that I “thought” was being gracious toward my situation by planning a mortgage of her paying for the 15 yr rate., and me paying the 30 yr rate, (being it brought my end lower), but which also took the most part of my entire income. Like you, I always LOVED to work but being I was taken out of the work force, I honestly thought I could trust that after being put on disability and losing my house in the interim, this “opportunity” was meant for a reason. FAST FORWARD>>>We (my cousin & I) went “in” on a very small 2 BR Condo together. The only reason we went “in” on it together, is because of the small disability check that the gov’t so graciously awarded me, (Thank God I had THAT!) and I just couldn’t afford it alone just on Social Security, Medicaid and Food Stamps. I have never felt so belittled with having to depend on ANYONE and certainly NEVER did I think the wheels would go counterclockwise on me after I put my total trust in her! This all reminded me of that most ridiculous, and childish way of Kenya trying to take over your whole beautiful day, just to get a rise out of you and to get all eyes on her..(in my case it was a RELATIVE AT THAT!) She lives in NY with her “well-off soulmate”, but has still managed to deceive me in so many ways as well, through many childish antics and many mistrustful ways while placing herself on top of the pedestal, placing me where she wanted me, right at the bottom. Therefore, here I am, back to square one of mistrusting and shall I call it, “buyer’s remorse” since all of this has gone down the way it has. Somehow, someway, I am getting through it all and I guess that is why I am trying reach out to you to tell you just how proud I am of how you have gotten as far as you have. Even as I’ve started watching you with Donald Trump, (love him!) all the ups & downs with the girls and the journey of hatred, love & laughter that you have been through. YOU have been there giving me that “PUSH? . Even though your shows are on Sundays, I still watch the reruns every night they are on, just in case I was out of the room and missed a line! (no DVR) Even then, since I got my laptop going, here I am, catching up on whatever I have missed. You have made me laugh, (much needed) you have made me cry and you have just “grown” on me and taught me that no matter what, life does go on. You find out who your friends and:”frienemies” are and most of all, how you, yourself have grown with dealing with the changes that life brings you. Right now, I?m doing the best I can to find a way to make an income from home, before I lose whatever mind I do have left! I?m not looking for hand-outs, pity or a dress to twirl around in! (I know, that was uncalled for!) I am looking for advice though. I have written on a lot of your pages many times, before my surgery and have just been able to get back to typing. I don?t know which pages you read, or if you ever respond. I don?t believe I have ever seen you respond to anyone and I would LOVE to have my own personal way of conversing with you where the whole world isn?t peeking in. I?m an extremely trustworthy person, so you can certainly count on that! I wouldn?t like to call myself lonely, because I?m not. I really do wish though, that I had a true friend that I could count on as a true and honest friend, who tells it like it is. Like I have said, ?trusting? is hard for me and I don?t like being that way, as it isn?t fair to others. So, if you need to take a break and throw some ideas back at me where I can actually call myself ?successful? once again, honey?I?m wide-open to it! With all of this said?Geepers, I am jumping from one subject to another here and probably repeating myself over & over, so, I?ll excuse myself for that! Let?s just get your health in line first, THEN you can add me to your plate, How does that sound? Pen-pals? BLOOP! Hey, gotta start somewhere! Love you Mrs. Leakes & Mr. Leakes gets a great big hug for taking good care of you! I?m not celebrating holidays this years, but Happy First Holidays to the most gorgeous bride I have ever seen in my life/and her goofy guy! Gregg, you crack me up! OXOXO November 21 at 5:36pm / Log in to Reply Jennmize Oh my word Nene, I’m so sorry to hear you had to go through this. I had clots in both of my lungs and my legs 2 weeks after I had my daughter. I was in the hospital for a week and on blood thinners for 6-months. You are strong Nene and will get through this. The pain was awful (at least in my situation, the clots were big), I wouldn’t wish any if it on my worst enemy, let alone someone as fabulous as you Nene. I hope you are feeling better and are able to enjoy the holidays with your family and friends. Merry Christmas! December 18 at 11:07am / Log in to Reply Le’shawn Shawnie Banks I am so sorry to hear that you to had a pulmonary embolism. I have been struggling with the factor five disorder. Which is a blood clotting disorder that causes me to have clots on my lungs. And around my heart for 10 years. I have had in 2013 alone 18 episodes of pneumonia. I’m not on warfarin. I am on blood thinning injections for the rest of my life. I am so blessed to see that you made it through with Gods grace and mercy. By me having to learn how to walk again and now I am finally back at work I know God can heal. Just like he healed you. May god continue to bless you and you wonderful glam fam honey. Be blessed. Form Leshawn Banks and Family. God is a great God… January 1 at 9:34pm / Log in to Reply